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13 Ways to Better Sex
Description
The following is a discussion of thirteen common sense keys to sexual happiness and pleasure. For the benefit of parents monitoring their children's web surfing, be advised that nothing explicit is presented here-merely the rules of courtesy and regard useful in maneuvering the most human of all human conditions.
Know-how
Correct and proper information about sex can double your sexual prowess. A lot of the beliefs and information our society has about sex is misinformation. For example, a woman who cannot orgasm during intercourse is believed to be suffering from untreatable frigidity, and a man who loses his erection during intercourse is thought to have unresolved anger toward his partner or has lost his affection for her. According to recent studies, it has been found that many women are experiencing orgasms through means other than intercourse, and through proper training, many people are finding new ways to enjoy sex. Misinformation or the absence of proper knowledge about sex can interfere with a couple's mutual understanding, give rise to hurt feelings, and ultimately reduce sexual enjoyment.
Bravery
For the most superb sex life, a little bit of bravery is essential. You have to be unafraid or not embarrassed to try new things and be experimental. Of course, things may not always turn out the way you expect them to and you may end up in an awkward situation. However, you should not be daunted by such mishaps because there is a first time for everything. Being a little red in the face is nothing compared to the rewards and benefits of being a little brave and going with your feelings and living out your fantasies.
Freedom
True sexual freedom is freedom from doing something that one does not desire and being free from such suppressive thoughts as, “I have to?or “I need to.? Love comes to us in a very natural way, without any type of force, out of free will. Anything done of a sense of duty does not have much meaning. Undue obligations and anxiety arising from such pressures can inhibit sexual potency and deter the body's response to stimuli. If this continues untreated, psychogenic impotence in men and sexual apathy in women will occur. We need to be able to have the freedom to say no to things we do not want; with such flexibility within a relationship, comes sexual improvement.
Participation
The utmost satisfaction in sex depends a lot on how much you and your partner are willing to actively participate in it. A passive bystander-type attitude is not going to enrich your sex life.
Belief
In order to free oneself from the unhealthful grip of suppression, there has to be trust among the parties involved. Without trust, anxiety and dissatisfaction take over, and it becomes difficult to be honest with your partner, causing further damage.
Generosity
As in life, a person who can share and give in a relationship will be better able to experience a much broader and deeper scope of sexuality.
Communication
If you are able to express your desires and wants to another without hurting their feelings, you have very good communication skills. This ability is important in all aspects of life, but it is also very important in the bedroom.
Love
The most satisfying sex only happens between two people who are in love.
The wisdom to seek help
At times, couples are faced with sexual problems they are not able to handle. For proper treatment, a consultation with a professional is advisable.
Health
No matter how positive and conscientious one may be, if a person is not healthy or suffering from a disease, sex will suffer. Only the healthy will be able to take full advantage of all that life has to offer. However, we can lower our health risks by engaging in hobbies or participating in an exercise program.
Equality
Chauvinistic behavior only limits and cuts short the many possibilities in sex and an open-ended relationship. The notion that only the man can initiate sex and that women should only follow the lead of men is a very narrow-minded idea. This sort of one-sided view of equality can also limit the physical senses, hampering trips to captivating and wondrous areas of the senses otherwise possible.
The senses
Sex is not just an orgasm. Regardless of the particular stage (attraction, arousal, climax, resolution) in the process of sexual engagement, each has its own flavor in the taste bud of our senses. The extent to which we are able to experience this depends on how well we develop our senses. Concentrating and taking an active part in the pleasures of sex will heighten our sensitivity.
Humor
We take sex too seriously. It needs to be instilled with some playfulness and enjoyed as a form of recreation, given everything in the relationship is settled, of course. Being able to laugh in light of a difficult situation will carry you through many psychological hurdles, as well as reduce your risk of psychogenic sexual problems.
There are some individual differences, but most men reach their sexual peak in their early 20s; women start to reach their prime in their 30s.
In other words, there is a 10-year difference, on average, in the sexual peaks of men and women. In light of this, some sexologists claim that a younger man-older women combination is more practical and results in a better sexual match. Historically, this been a trend.
The age differential in the sexual peaks of men and women, in theory, may just be a number, but in practice, this is the deciding factor in the fine line between happiness and misery. After age 40, men's sexual ability decreases markedly, but contrary to this, women's abilities do not. At this juncture, men may start to worry over their sexual ineptitude, feeling guilty and unworthy for not being able to satisfy their partner.
In the case of women, their sexual desire increases with age and with the experience of going through a pregnancy and having a child. Does this mean then that men will be troubled with such obligations throughout their middle age?
Fortunately, sex is not a desired goal in itself but merely one of many forms of expressing love. Besides intercourse, there are plenty of ways to express love, including affectionate caresses, soft words of endearment, and even romantic kisses. Commonly cherished memories, little things that show you still care, and other reminders of your love are the real ties that bind a marriage.
Trying to fix the situation with forced and unnatural obligatory sex will be meaningless and unsatisfying. For couples who are suffering from sexual incompatibility or are in the 40s and 50s age-bracket, a gradual shift in sexual expression to sensual and mental pleasures will go a long way to help resolve this problem.
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